finding peace in being alone

I’ve not seen much conversation about being alone in your 20’s, I’ve heard people say it’s a good time to be alone to find yourself but I’ve never truly understood that because I’ve never really been around people who haven’t been in a relationship, it seems like a pinpoint in everybody’s lives once you get to the age of 18. Finding your destined partner and clinging onto that person living happily ever after. When you’re alone you have no choice but to get to know yourself truly, you’re unable to get lost in the love and drama of somebody else, you have to put yourself first, which is so fucking hard. It is so easy to pour your love into someone else but somewhat painful to even give yourself an ounce of that love, why? 

You can’t hide away from the ugly parts of yourself, you get to see who you are so clearly and sometimes it’s not nice. It is scariest of all to discover after years of living, you’re a complete strange to yourself and you in fact have no idea who or what you truly are, what you love, why you love, what you feel or why you feel that way. There are relationships that make your soul flourish but I don’t believe they just exist in the form of heterosexual ‘norm’ or gf/gf, bf/bf relationships, true and loving friendships can set your soul alight and fill your heart with a softness that you need. Moments have the possibility of sparking something so deep inside- that you can’t help but explain it as love, your love for music, how does that make you feel? The way the kindness of a stranger makes you rethink and believe in humanity for just a split second, love exists everywhere. Don’t be afraid to be alone because you fear not being loved, love is everywhere in everyone and everything. It is not something you seek, you are love, even under all the pain you feel, if you dig hard enough, you will find a blazing love inside.

There are moments in life where you will experience love so intensely and you need to believe that it will come and go throughout all the years you live, you will experience all different types of love with different people. Take the parts in life when you’re alone, not as moments to wait for the next person but as a time to experience life with just yourself and reflect on everything that you are and what you want to be. Be ready so that if the next love does come, you’re so deeply involved with yourself you will not accept anything or anybody that doesn’t ignite your soul and fill your life with peace; accept and get comfortable with changes in life and appreciate that you’re able to love and that you are loveable, whether you’re with someone or not. 

“In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you.”